I don’t get any. Respect that is. I won’t lie and pretend it doesn’t bother me. It does. Alot. I am sure whether you would like to admit it or not it bothers you too. I know a secret though that perhaps will help you as it occasionally does me.

That secret is that chances are you never had respect and that parallel to the mass of men who lead lives of quiet desperation is another silent army of men who toil endlessly for the golden apple of respect…in the eyes of your fellow man.

Read on to see what I mean

So if you’re in debtors prison chances are you were accepted into a somewhat prestigious institution. And you were congratulated. But before you could turn around you were at that University where by definition everyone was in the same boat as you. So you tried to distinguish yourself with grades, but the reward for each positive grade was yet another class, until you got a job or into grad school and there was congratulations…but not respect.

So then something happened. Maybe you lost your job or couldn’t find one. Maybe you are underemployed. Maybe you just borrowed to heavily and even wages in the top 10% of degree holders in your field isn’t enough to sustain you. And you received condolensces. Unlike respect or pride which is always one room away…shame, bitterness and regret immediately set in. Note however, you never had respect and truth be told were probably unlikely ever to get it going down that path.

Examples of this are endless. Let’s not pick on doctors or lawyers for a change. If we look at professional athletes we see that. They want to win rings, they want to be all-stars, they want to set records they want to be in the hall of fame. Every state senator wants to be a US Rep, every US Rep wants to be a US Senator and every Senator wants to be President. Every President wants to be re-elected. Ever Second term President wants to pass the torch to someone of their choosing and having done that wants a particular historical legacy, one that won’t become clear until two generations after they are dead.

It’s pointless. Houses, cars, spouses…these vary greatly in quality. The inside of a pine box is pretty standard.

Now I am going to say something cheesy. The only respect that matters is self-respect. I know. Rocky Balboa. I love Rocky, particularly Rocky IV.  But here is the point. Nobody ever told you the secret of self-respect. But I am going to. The secret of Self-Respect is to do something honorable, difficult, or noteworthy and not tell another living soul. Save a life without a white coat. Solve a crime without a badge. Clear and innocent man without a briefcase inside a BMW. Do any one of an infinite number of laudable things and never talk about it. You’ll feel better. I promise.